A Slippery Slope

The fact that I've got more than one person emailing plates like this is amazes me. Just a note to those thinking about labeling themselves from the state of Kentucky. KY is also a very popular, uh, personal product.

Alex seems to agree with me. He writes: [This vanity plate] has become somewhat of an urban legend around Columbus. But anyway, we really hope that she is from Kentucky.

Amanda sent us KY AM I. So this might be "Kentucky am I" as well, but it doesn't make much sense either way. Confused am I.

Our last example comes from Corianne. She also has second thoughts about this plate: We all know what this is *supposed* to say, but the 12 year old inside of me can't help but snicker every time I see it.

There you have it folks. It's good to know that my 12 year old isn't the only one getting a laugh from these. Thank you Kentucky.

It's funnier now that I get it

DNT B L8 is from TheWordWire. She writes: Man, the only thing worse than sitting in traffic, is being nagged by the car you're stuck behind. This guy's not the boss of me!

Yeah, why on earth would you get a plate like this? Because you want everyone to hate you? Does not compute. Although, I guess a lot of people want us to hate them.

The last two plates are from MooseNuggette. UR2SLO (You're too slow). I don't know if mixing one's annoyance for sluggish drivers and love for the San Diego Chargers is a great idea. Because it looks to me like you think they're "slow".
I won't hold this against you if you can't figure it out at first... It says MOVEIT backwards. You know, so that if you see this one in your rear view mirror, you'll get the hint. MooseNuggette adds: If you’re dyslexic you’ll see Vomit 3.

So for today, *sigh*, I will be dyslexic.

Also, I'm $ingle if you're rich.

NO 2ISHN (No tuition) comes to us from Jody. She had the same feelings about this one as I did:

My mom and I parked next to this one at Trader Joe's the other night and it made me want to vomit... 'No Tuition', as in, I don't have to pay tuition because Mommy and Daddy take care of it? I decided to spend my tuition money on a smarmy car? Who needs education when you have a sweet, sweet ride? Man, the driver must be a grade-A tool.

You know, I am happy for someone who gets around that big bill of tuition somehow, but to boast about it on your Lexus's vanity plate? Kind of a jerk move, if you ask me. I spent a good portion of my tuition on Keystone Light, but I'm not bragging about it.

Jesus Loves Alaska

TYGSUS (T.Y. Jesus, or Thank You Jesus) is from MooseNugette in Alaska. GSUS probably does not appreciate this spelling, which looks like "gasus" or "gisus". It's odd, too, that this is plastered on Alaska's semi-centennial vanity plate, like Jesus was personally involved in 50 years of Alaska statehood.

More lovin' the Lord Sunday posts for your enjoyment in the link.

Bite me!

Heidi sent in this Jaguar's vanity plate which reads: VETS CAT. I assume the "vet" reference is there because you are a veterinarian. And a jaguar is a big cat. It also happens to be a line of luxury vehicles. So punny. Who needs a real cat when they claw and pee on you all day at work? Not this guy apparently.

I bet your cougar is jealous. HAR HAR HAR.

Hide your children

see more Fail Blog

Many of you sent this to me, but I can't help but share it with those who have not seen it yet, RU 18 YET (Are you 18 yet?).

I swear, this whole state is filled with pervs. See: Would You Like a Popsicle?

I have no friends. It's just me and the voices.

RU CRAZY (Are you crazy)? The answer is simple. Yes, you are crazy for putting the word NUT on your license plate. There are several well known definitions of the word nut, one of which is crazy, the other is, well, you know...

Our first nut is from Carm. She writes: "... Are happy nuts!!!"

In that case, please do no operate heavy machinery.

NUTS4OH (Nuts for Ohio?). I put the "Oh" in Ohio. And that's more of an, "Ohhh?" rather than an, "Ohhh!"

Five?! Maybe you should have a doctor take a look at that.

Our nut plates came from:

Shae M. - RU CRAZY
Melani X. - 5 NUTZ
Amanda - NUTS4OH

Georgina S. - IM NUTZ

Carm the Crazy Cat Lady - BUSINUTZ

Drugs are bad, mmmkay?

STIL2 HI (Still too high) was captured by wondermart. Somehow I doubt this is a stand against housing prices or the cost of gas. I'm guessing this person is on their way to find some Haagen-Dazs ice cream and Captain Crunch with the little crunch berries.

Kolleen snapped a picture of WASTED. Wasted... like, drunk or intoxicated? Like you wasted money on buying such a stupid plate? You deserve to be pulled over and taken to jail with a plate like that.

Previously, Beer is the answer, but I can't remember the question.

And Baked.

We're not arrogant; We're just better than you

Football season is upon us, so we're going to celebrate with some fanatical vanity plates.

PLSWIN (please win) is a Green Bay Packers vanity plate and comes to us from fivetomatoes. At least they are asking nicely. It wouldn't surprise me to see a WINNOW out there somewhere though. Those Packer fans are scary.

R8DRH8R (Raider Hater) comes to us from PoetrySue. Hey, what is silver and black, silver and black, and silver and black? A drunken Raider fan rolling down the bleachers.

And finally, this Cleavland Browns plate is from Mark F.

FPITBG means exactly what you think it does: F*** Pittsburgh. Awesome job not catching that one, Ohio DMV.

Even more football plates for your enjoyment: I'll have one Roethlisberger With Ketchup and Cheese

Miss B. Haven, please meet Ann Thrax and her husband, Cy N. Ide

Here are a few selections from the archive of women who should have thought twice before they selected their vanity plate. Eesh. Here we go...

Our first is from Amanda T., MZBEHVN (Misbehavin' or Miss B. Haven). She writes:

I caught this one at a gas station in Washington state. I think it was the gas station attendant's car, so I had to be sneaky so she wouldn't see me. I thought it was a pretty awesome plate on its own, then realized that it's made even MORE awesome since the tags are from 5/2001. So she really is living up to her name!

Meg G. sent in MZPUR T. Nothing bothers me more than the pronunciation of the word "pretty" as "purdy." Meg writes: But "MZPUR T" (Ms. Purty) could have a much more amusing plate if it was "MZTUR T" (Mr. T).

Somehow I doubt this person is cool enough to know who Mr. T. is. I pity this fool.
Kate writes: I've been stalking this plate for awhile...I was waiting for a good shot! Its a doozie!

H1M8NS = High Maintenance.

Go ahead, let the eye rolling commence.

Tank you, tank you berry much.

Aw yeah, welcome to another edition of Lovin' the Lord Sunday, the only place on the internets where we can all wonder why people choose vanity plates of the religious kind. 10Q LORD was captured by Andi H. I had to tink for quite some time about this one.

TEN + "Q" = TEN...CUE = Thank you? Yeah, it's supposed to say "Thank you Lord."

You're welcome.

To err is human; To arr is PIRATE

Ahoy! It's September 19, and you hopefully know what that means: International Talk Like A Pirate Day! If you don't know how to talk like a pirate, maybe some of these vanity plates can help... ARRMATEY is from Sydney J. "Arr matey" simply means, I agree my friend. Aye, aye Captain is also equivalent.

Pirates arrrr the scallywags doin' the drinking, plundering, and making people walk the plank! This plunderer made a blunder with that extra T, no? I think PIR8 would have sufficed. Ye old pirates aren't so good at spelling and grammARRR.
Melani X. clears PYRETTE up for us: So...she's like a Rockette with a peg leg and an eye patch? Now THAT'S talent!

Or maybe a wench with a nice booty. YOHOHO and a bottle of rum. Or grog as the pirates like to call it. This plate, in addition to PIR8T, were captured by LadyStyx.

As for me and Mr. HLP? We talk like pirates everyday, YARR HARR HARR!

Just for fun, Pirate Name Generator.

Turd Eaters and Lustful Sedans

Here are two misinterpretation plates for you on this lovely Friday. Please enjoy.
LST CAR is from gigi. She explains: For my first submission, here is something for "Fun with Misinterpretations." It is my mother's plate. We got it for her because she swore this would be her "Last Car"; that was two cars ago! My father, her ex, teases her that it could also mean "Lost Car." I can think of at least one more interpretation.

Lust car it is!

Our second misinterpretation comes to us from Kate in the land of HLPs, Virginia. ATETUD, I guess, is supposed to mean attitude some how? Looks more to me like you are eating TUDS (ATE TUD), or as I like to imagine, TURDS. Try a better spelling next time, poop eater.

Poor people drive the nicest cars!

Yes, good credit is sooo 2007. Let's explore the vanity plates of people who don't care to spill their bad financial moves in a public forum, shall we?
Robin D. sends in WE B BROK (We be broke?). She writes: The first plate was spotted in a restaurant parking lot... and was with several other Corvettes from Ohio. They all had vanity plates, but none were as dumb as this one. If you're so broke, maybe you should sell your Corvette!
Becky found a similar conundrum, IN DEBT. Note that this car is a BMW (average selling price: $35,000). She writes: Yeah, me too. Except I drive a minivan.
LadyStyx snapped O MYDEBT (this was on a fairly newish car). Yes, we know it hurts, but we still don't feel sorry for you.

Hey, here's a novel idea. STOP SPENDING YOUR MONEY ON STUPID VANITY PLATES. Argh. What is wrong with people?

Narcissism looks so good on you.

Donna F. sent in UPPITY: Well, gee! I think if you are willing to splash it across the back of your 'vette its probably true.

Uppity? Like arrogant, conceited, and snobbish?? Sounds like a great vanity plate to me. I fancy myself fabulous!
LadyStyx sent in XQUZET (exquisite). Look at me. I'm made of awesome.
Sandi W. sent in 2MCH4U, which I assume means Too Much For You. A.K.A: Let's never be friends.
Katie O. sent in our last plate of the day, CRZY WMN (crazy woman). Ha, I am guessing "crazy" doesn't even begin to cover it.

Why, people?! WHY!!

He who laughs last thinks slowest; He who laughs first has the dirtiest mind.

For those of you living under a rock, LOL = Laugh out loud (or lots of laughs).

Our first laughter themed plate comes from LadyStyx who writes: I guess LOL or LMAO were taken? For the record OMG LOL, AWWW WTF, and BRB LOL are also taken.
LOLCAT was sent in by Dan. It seems appropriate that a crazy lolcat would drive a scooter. Those lolcats do a lot of things when were not looking.

LOL BOX is from Kathryn D. I know this is a "boxy" Scion xB but there is more than one meaning for that second word...
LOLRUS is from Jasmine. Get it? Lolrus? Jasmine writes: This is our license plate. I regret it now, only because I think "LOLCAR" would have been so much better.

I kind of love this plate (yes, I said it), just because it combines two of my favorite things, walruses and laughing.

You Lie!

There are certain types of vehicles that seem to attract the kind of people who get vanity plates. The Ford Mustang is definitely one of them.


We start with XPNSVE from Kelly T. She writes: [This plate] is just plain ridiculous. I mean seriously, how expensive could a Mustang be when they're almost as common as my Accord? This guy was getting off the highway in Scottsdale, AZ (a place where a BMW would be considered a daily driver.)


What you don't know is that the trunk is filled with gold bars and Cristal. And leprechauns. And broken dreams.

GIDDYUP is from Kathy in VA. You know, because a mustang is a horse. HAR HAR HAR.

Another, hey-my-car-is-a-horse plate. WONELLI (Whoa Nelly!) is from Alison B. I can't find where that phrase originates, but I do know it's what you shout at your horse when you want it to slow down. Argh. Too. Much. Thinking.

Girrrrrrl, watch out for MZ ATUDE (Ms. Attitude)! She will misspell your way into insanity. Plate snapped by Karl M.

It's the new dance craze.

Chris J. sent in GDSWAY1. I am guessing this is some sort message to the affect of, God's Way or there is only "1" way, God's Way, but I also see God Sway or Good Sway. Which sounds like a dance, doesn't it? Isn't really that effective of a message, eh?

This isn't the first plate from people who dance (or whatever) for the Lord.

wanker

Danielle from Small Town Police Blotters (hilarious blog, btw) sent in RUB1OUT. Does that really say RUB ONE OUT? Really? On a license plate?? Sigh.

She writes: Seen in a walmart parking lot. Despite being a Minnesota tag, the car was spotted in southeastern S. Dakota... I wonder if this is an attempt to explain away the driver's habit for distractedly weaving & drifting across lanes? Furthermore, I wonder how this got past the license plate censors, especially in wholesome ol' Minnesota. lol.

I keep trying to convince myself they are big fans of Disney's Aladdin and are trying to get Robin Williams to pop out of a lamp. Oi! Ten thousand years will give you such a crick in the neck.

More like "Unoriginal Rock"

Carm the Crazy Cat Lady sent in this picture today and I think it's totally great because I often refer to the plates on this site as real gems, but now we have an actual vanity plate claiming just that. Too bad it's the exact opposite of a real gem. It does, however, make me want to play Bejeweled-- I blast those jewels in my sleep, yo. (If you've never played that game I warn you, it can be quite addicting!)

And while we are talking about all things shiny and geological...

IRSHJWL (Irish Jewel) comes to us from Jen H. She writes: Hmmmm... someone actually thinks they're special!

Special like a snowflake (definition 2).

You know, that car

Amanda sent in THAT CAR to us, and immediately upon it's arrival I spit the contents of my mouth all over the laptop screen. It's *that* car. Let's zoom out, shall we?


There, that is better. Now you can see the bullet holes in the doll heads stacked on the roof. [wtf?]


You know, that car that has all those skeletons hanging from the front bumper...?
... that car that has flaming headlights? A Shrek doll hook ornament? And is that a bobble head?
... that car with shells super glued to the hood?
... that car that is making ever child in this photo clutch their mothers, scared and confused?
... that car with all the DISMEMBERED BABY DOLLS?


Yes, that one.


A car like this doesn't need a vanity plate, it needs a lobotomy for it's owner.