Wednesday, December 24, 2008

SANTA?! I KNOW HIM!!

Stephanie F. wrote to me a few weeks ago: I took this picture outside of a store that was having pictures with Santa. I guess the sleigh needed an upgrade!

I thought Santa drove a big red sleigh, not an Oldsmobile Cutlass? And why does he have Virginia plates? Oh well, at least there won't be any reindeer pooping on my roof this Christmas if Santa arrives in his sedan. Ho, ho, ho.

Reminds me of one of my favorite scenes from the best Christmas movie ever, Elf:

Buddy: Who the heck are you?
Gimbel's Santa: What are you talkin' about? I'm Santa Claus.
Buddy: No, you're not.
Gimbel's Santa: Uh, why of course I am! Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
Buddy: Well, if you're Santa, what song did I sing for you on your birthday this year?
Gimbel's Santa: Um, Happy Birthday of course. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. How old are you son?
Kid with Santa: Four.
Gimbel's Santa: You're a big boy. What's your name?
Kid with Santa: Paul.
Gimbel's Santa: Now what can I get you for Christmas?
Buddy: Don't tell him what you want, he's a liar.
Gimbel's Santa: Let the kid talk.
Buddy: You disgust me! How can you live with yourself?
Gimbel's Santa: Just cool it, Zippy.
Buddy: You sit on a throne of lies.
Gimbel's Santa: Look, I'm not kiddin'.
Buddy: You're a fake.
Gimbel's Santa: I'm a fake?
Buddy: Yes!
Gimbel's Santa: How'd you like to be dead, huh? Ho, ho, just kidding.
Buddy: You stink.
Gimbel's Santa: I think you're gonna have a good Christmas, all right.
Buddy: You smell like beef and cheese, you don't smell like Santa.

9 comments:

Nokomis Snape said...

I love Buddy the Elf...he's just great!

Great plate too...maybe the guy looks like Santa...like my dad *paranoid*

Arlynn said...

One of my favorite scenes too, as well as this one liner when he answers the phone in his dad's office:

"Buddy the Elf, what's your favorite color?"

Oh, and the licence plate is funny too. However if I were a child & saw a mall Santa driving that car with that plate, mom & dad would have some explaining to do...

Deborah Godin said...

This is way better than a sleigh. If you don't get what you want, retaliation is easy. You can't let the air out of a reindeer...

(my fave Christmas movie is The Ref. It's more for the grown-ups, than the kiddies - lots of swears - but totally hilarious)

Miss Kolleen said...

Virginia at least keeps up with the yes Virginia theme!


Also... Goodbye Mr narwhal!

Mari said...

I love that scene in Elf! My other favorite santa story is the one david sedaris tells in his book holidays on ice: He was working as an elf at a foo foo department store in new york city. There was a really long line of kids, and one of the moms got really nasty.
She told david sedaris, "I'm going to have you fired." He leaned over and whispered in her ear, "I'm going to have you killed!"

FreedomFirst said...

You have to read the Santa story I'm posting for Flashback Friday. I don't want it to spoil everyone's holiday so I'll let it wait.

joan said...

My favorite scene in Elf is when Buddy tries to put the star at the top of the tree by bouncing off the couch.
Love Elf, and love this blog!

Yvie said...

Yes, Virginia. There is a Santa Claus.

Cat said...

My dad's license plate is SANTA.

And yes, he is a professional Santa Claus.

I also know the man that has CLAUS in our state. And he is a professional Santa as well..