Saturday, February 28, 2009

Was it good for you?

GR84US2 = Great for us, too.

Erika S. writes us:

Stopped by my local grocery store after work, and saw this in the parking lot. What was great for them too? It's almost sexual in a really creepy kind of way.

This definitely fits the creepy criteria.

Friday, February 27, 2009

Smooth Move

Donna F. sent this one to me the other day with this tidbit of information for us:

He used to work at Los Angeles International (LAX).

Uh, it's also the name of a popular laxative, which if you didn't know already, is a drug taken to induce bowel movements or to loosen the stool, most often to treat constipation. Ex-worker FAIL.

I really hope this is the last post I have to do about the consistency of someone's bowel movements, thankyouverymuch.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

The Shaggin' Wagon

This photo was captured by Persnickety Ticker on her way to Disney. You know what they say: If the van is a rockin', don't come a knockin'.

Oh, and one more creepy van for your viewing pleasure. Plus, this is how I feel about the public use of the word "lover." *shudder*

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

The Person Everyone Loves To Hate And Never Wants To Become

You know, the one your mother warned you about. Psssh.

Didn't get your fill? How about more men with annoying trucks?

Thanks, Jen D.!

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Talk To The Hand

Are you seeing what I'm seeing? Whatever, MF? I am pretty sure MF doesn't refer to "my friend" either.

Thanks for the photo Kate. I like how you included this driver's rusty ball in the photo as well. Nice touch.

Most Wanted Week of 2/22

Here's this week's Most Wanted via Twitter. @MrsRJRG gets the award for best plate this week with her tweet of "SHETRNY." I don't know what to say, except you guys are awesome! Can't wait to see what you find next @LicensePlteBlah.

El_Smacky @LicensePlteBlah White Toyota with AZ plate: KAMRI. Guess what the model was?

Smoochiefrog @LicensePlteBlah Seen yesterday, TYM 4LUV

mouseybrat @LicensePlteBlah here is what i saw over the weekend... FAJITA, POOLS1, PHOTOS and BUGLUV.

DChi606 @LicensePlteBlah A big pick-up truck with plate "MR WOOD." I'm assuming the owner is in construction, but wonder how that slipped by DMV.

kbrobaseball @LicensePlteBlah state plate: XXL-666. Does this mean the devil's a big dude?

MrsRJRG @LicensePlteBlah "DAMSEXY", "DRK NHT", "READHEAD". I wasn't able to verify the veracity of these plates though.

MrsRJRG @LicensePlteBlah "I♥MYJON". Normally this isn't funny. But because 'Jon' is also synonymous with 'toilet', it is quite humorous indeed.

j_hulme @LicensePlteBlah - LA<3LADI - I think they used to be called ladies of the night, but that doesn't fit on a plate!

MrsRJRG @LicensePlteBlah "SHETRNY" ... She-Trany? It was a woman driving.... I think

j_hulme @LicensePlteBlah - AVID O2 - Yes, I like my oxygen as well. I don't need a plate for it.

DChi606 @LicensePlteBlah "TRBO SKY" on - you guessed it - a Saturn Sky... which almost ran me over.

kmtetour @LicensePlteBlah from levarburton: RT @DanHardman: Levar Burton's license plate: "KUNTA". True story. Source: LA Times

Monday, February 23, 2009

What Light Through Yonder Windshield Breaks?

Dear Horrible License Plates,
I saw this plate in a parking lot on the campus of Indiana University. The lot was fairly close to the English building, so I can only hope that this car belongs to one of the many prominent Renaissance scholars there. I mean, who wouldn't want to roll up to a Shakespeare conference or class with his or her very own personalized Billy Shakes license plate? I can only hope that if Shakespeare were alive today he would be willing and eager to remove the vowels from his name for the sake of 6 character license plate awesomeness.

Yours in vanity,
Lindsay K.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

I Found Jesus, He's in Vegas

So this is where he's been hiding out all these years - NEVADA!

Doesn't this look like Black Jesus? I had to really force myself to see Be Like Jesus in this. The whole thing is just confusing, especially that spiked vanity plate holder. One thing can be agreed on though, this driver is definitely Lovin' the Lord.

Thanks Sue!

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Redundancy in 8 Characters or Less

Ohio, I thought you were screening these things? How did this driver ever get his dirty plate past the eagle eyes at the Ohio DMV? Is that second 69 really necessary? You drive your mother around in that car?!

Personally, I'd rather eat TOFU.

Kimberly P., thanks for sticking to the true theme here... Creepiness in 8 characters or less. I have to go look at pictures of cute kittehs now to get this mental image to go away.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Metamucil… It Keeps Me Regular

BLOC-POO comes to us from an anonymous submitter. Man, I cannot think of a single pleasant interpretation of this plate. It's all colons, enemas, and constipation. Looking for some help on this one I turned to Google. They returned the suggestion, "Did you mean black poo?" No, and I think I just puked a little.

Maybe it's a whole city block of poop? Maybe your deuce comes out in blocks?

Whatever it is, the world does not want to know.


The following is a list of license plates banned by the Ohio Bureau of Motor Vehicles between Jan. 1, 2007, and Jan. 29, 2009. Prepare to laugh your asses off. Our thanks goes to Georgina S. for sending this in to us.

I am shocked that someone would think they could get away with some of these plates. Where do you think you are? Virginia? (ziiiiing!)

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Kwuz’in For A Bwuz’in

We picked on the MINI Cooper yesterday. I think today we will harass the very uncreative PT Cruiser owners of the HLP archives. Really guys? You're almost as bad as these two.

Heidi writes:

It does seem awfully unnecessary to put the name of your car on your plate, especially if you are going to spell it wrong.
Jen H. sent in the next two:

Baby talk. In vanity plate form. Of the car's model. An all around cringe-worthy event right here.

Chrysler announced the discontinuation of the PT Cruiser, altogether, on January 12, 2009. Sorry bad spellers of the world, you'll have to find a new car name to botch.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

These Cars Mock Themselves

So I thought today would be a good day to pick on our old friend the MINI Cooper. I don't know why, but for some reason a good number of the people who drive this car feel compelled to get vanity plates stating that, yes, they indeed own a MINI Cooper. Completely annoying.

Our first two submissions came from our good friend LadyStyx:
1FNMINI. Yep, I see one f'n MINI.

MINIWE? Like your wee-wee?

Our next submission comes from platerazzo, Jen H.

Georgina S. sent us MA BUG:
Wait a second, I thought VW Beetles were bugs? No? Ah, whatever.

If you are dying for more MINI Cooper plates you can see LILPUKN here and BMPRCAR here.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

This Post Goes To 11

Today's post is brought to you by:

HVYMTL. Sent in by RebelYell.

First up is METLICA brought to us by Kolleen who writes:

The Metallica one is my friend's plate-- She's a HUGE Metallica fan for some ungodly reason. She even has their logo tattooed on the back of her neck. I keep trying to tell her that I question if Metallica was ever good, but she's not buying it. Oh well.

Kat sent in STRYPER. Does anyone remember these guys? All I have to say after watching that video is that those are some very impressive perms.

Jen H. snapped BONJ[heart]V. You give vanity plates a bad name. More impressive perms and pyrotechnics here.

And lastly, we have Megadeth. Forged in the bowels in hell.

Thanks Georgina S.!

Most Wanted for the week of 2/15

Yay Twitter friends! I had an overwhelming response this week from the platerazzi working out on the roads. Here are the top ten for the week.

inearlymorning @LicensePlteBlah Also, DA BERZ. With the accompanying frame.

MusicGrl @LicensePlteBlah On a VW Golf: MAX PUKY. Not sure I'd want to get in that car

MrsRJRG @LicensePlteBlah "KUWLKAR" ...Kias are cool now?

kmtetour @LicensePlteBlah B CNTNT 1. With your driving? Not so much.

DChi606 @LicensePlteBlah I saw a motorcycle yesterday with a MD plate reading "AWK". Probably not intentional (random 3 letters) but still funny.

dandibandit @LicensePlteBlah I saw "DAFDYL 1" today. I didn't quite know what to think of it.

inearlymorning @LicensePlteBlah Yellow VW bug with plate YELLOW. Way to be creative.

kidneythief @LicensePlteBlah drove behind a BMW with "4U QTEE"....yikes

MrsRJRG @LicensePlteBlah "PCKR". Some one needs to buy them that bumper sticker, "Tailgate me and I'll flick a booger on your windshield."

mouseybrat @LicensePlteBlah here is what i have seen so far this week... STEMRS, DANSER, CLSSYD, and my favorite POOCHI.

El_Smacky @LicensePlteBlah AZ Freedom plate: 9ELEVIN (sic). Best part is the vehicle: huge-@$$ lifted truck w/tattered American flag paint job and tailgate mural that reads "Freedom Is Not Free". Followed them for a mile trying to get a pic, but couldn't--only had camera phone.

Actually, I decided to post ELEVIN (sic) instead. Har har. See you next week @LicensePlteBlah.

Monday, February 16, 2009

If You're Going to Spew; Spew In This

Here we have a little pumpkin, a photo snapped by Amy. Get it? Orange Mini Cooper looks like a pumpkin, doesn't it? So clever.

Wait just a second though. That plate says LIL... PUKN. PUKN= puking. No? Plus I think this hue of orange is probably the color of said puke after a night of binging on Budweiser and Cheetos. Trust me, it's not a pretty site.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

The Lord's Pirate

Chelsi C. sent us this submission for Lovin' the Lord Sunday. How does a pirate communicate with God? PRAY ARRRRR.

After you are done with your PRAY R for the day, why don't you check out our Facebook, Twitter, or MySpace pages? I am going to try and add "platerazzi" to the Urban Dictionary now.

UPDATE: We're official!

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Are You Feeling Sexy?

First of all I want to say Happy Valentine's Day. We love you. And what better way to celebrate this feast of love then with a creepy collection of hand picked vanity plates? I know nothing gets me more in the mood than a good personalized license plate or two.

VELVET comes from Jen H. who writes: It's so soft and fuzzy.... It just makes me want to rub my hands... all over my face to try to rub out the mental image of a random car driver trying to be sexy and seductive with his license plate. Creeptastic!

Stephanie F. writes: Obviously the HOTAMLE, like so many other drivers that make it onto your site, does not suffer from low self-esteem. You spicy little thing, you!

Kolleen sent in LDYTGR (Lady tiger, I presume). Grrrrrr!

Let's get it on. Bow-chicka-bow-wow!

Friday, February 13, 2009

Times up! Yours will say PLATE1

I agree with Courtney E. (who sent BLANK to us) that this was probably the scene at the DMV that day:

Truck owner: Errr, how 'bout one of them vanity license plates?
DMV: Alright, that's an extra $20. And what would you like it to say?
Truck Owner: I just want it blank. haHA.
DMV [with an evil twinkle in her eye]: Blank it is. Move along.

Three weeks later Truck Owner receives his plate with “BLANK” on it.

And scene.
Our second creativity award goes to PLATE 1. Doesn't this remind you of all the times you've gone to a new page in Word and the program automatically calls it "Document 1"? I supposed they have MS Vanity Plate Creator at the Illinois DMV.

That's what you get for listening to a paperclip. Thanks for the submission Kati M.!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

They Didn't Have Ice Cube So He Bought Vanilla Ice

Vanessa P. writes to us:

A few years ago I was working at the cinema in my town. The parking lot is very small, and this guy was parked right in the middle so everyone else was blocked in.

I guess if you're too cool for school you can do whatever the hell you want. I like the fact that Vanessa has kept this photo for, "a few years." Once the plate rage takes hold of you, it will never let go. Find redemption my fellow readers! Submit your HLPs to us. It's like therapy. For free.

You're welcome.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Don't Rave And Drive

I know to this driver it may seem like ecstasy to own a Mazda RX-8. To this driver I say, thanks for the message Mr. Obvious. If nothing annoys me more than a vanity plate, it's one with your make of car on it.

To me it looks like you have somewhat of a drug problem. RX is a symbol typically used for prescriptions. Ecstasy is a drug. Effects may include euphoria, decreased hostility and insecurity, and a tendency to dance like a fool for hours to nauseating techno music. Although this may also be attributed to being a douche bag.

Thanks for the submission Courtney E.!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

I've Got A Fever! And The Only Prescription... Is More Cowbell!

Erika S. helps us interpret this fantastic find:

The second I found your website, I knew the vanity plate I had to submit. This car is always parked on the next block over from my house (the owner lives on the block) and the first time I ever saw it, I laughed out loud. The owner is a young guy who one can only assume is a fan of the famed SNL skit. I managed to snap a shot today.

Get it?


Probably one of the best SNL skits of all time. So the fact that this driver put it on a vanity plate? I'll let it slide this time. By the way, my name is Bruce Dickinson. Yes, the Bruce Dickinson. I put my pants on just like the rest of you -- one leg at a time. Except, once my pants are on, I make gold records. The cock of the walk, baby!

UPDATE: For those of you who are totally confused (*ahem commenters) Erika has also submitted a link to the video of this skit. You guys are the best.

Most Wanted for the week of 2/8

Great work this week my Twitter friends. The plate rage seems to be spreading, and I like it. Found a plate you hate? Didn't get that picture? Tweet me, @LicensePlteBlah. <3 2BONE?! Dr. 69?? You find all the good ones...

amandavackrinos @licenseplteblah just saw CA plate "<3 2BONE" on a ford focus. how did that one slip by the dmv?

MrsRJRG @LicensePlteBlah "2NVTHIS". It wasn't anything to envy, trust me!

MusicGrl @LicensePlteBlah IS JESUS - not sure if it's theological angst or Loving the Lord.

MusicGrl @LicensePlteBlah 96-MPALA on a - *gasp* - '96 Impala.

MrsRJRG @LicensePlteBlah "ITS4XX" ... Really?

desikitteh @LicensePlteBlah seen yesterday, RXTURBO. guess what type of car it was. :op

MrsRJRG @LicensePlteBlah "TIMAAAH" a la South Park.

kmtetour @LicensePlteBlah DR 69. That's right. Either he's a sex doctor, or that's when he got his doctorate. hmmmm. I'm going with sex doctor.

geminitwinsfyre @LicensePlteBlah on a Fire Red 2009 Mustang "WAR HRS" with the way they were driving I'd say it could be hearse isntead of horse

mouseybrat @LicensePlteBlah I saw 4 horrible plates today. Starting with ROLO 2.Next was SAVE IT on what looked like a subcontractors pickup truck. Third was KNIZZA, google says this is a band and lastly ADWERA google says this is a breeder of Rhodesian Ridgebacks

freedomfirst @LicensePlteBlah I saw a license plate a few days back that I truly enjoyed. MADLYNN. I think it's perfect. It was on a minivan. It's the kind that leaves you wanting to know more. Did the woman's parents murder what was once a perfectly good name, or is her name "Lynn" and she suffers from anger issues or occasional dementia. I like to think it's the latter.

mouseybrat @LicensePlteBlah saw a lime green vw beatle last nite with the plate "FEISTY"

Monday, February 9, 2009

Worst. Pageant. Ever.

Here we have a young math enthusiast. She was crowned Ms. Math 1996 at the Nevada State Fair. I hear she won the talent portion by reciting pi to the 1000th decimal place. If she really works at it, someday she can rise to the rank of Doctor Math. Or with some really hard work, she'll be at the level of this vanity plate owner, MATHGOD. Bow down and worship me, I can solve some really hard equations.

MS MATH: Gina T.

MATHGOD: Taylor D.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

They'll Know We Are Christians By Our Lexuses?

You certainly are. Oddly enough a lot of the Lovin' the Lord vanity plates are on luxury vehicles. I haven't quite figured that paradox yet.

Nor have I figured out the plural of Lexus.

Keep 'em coming Jen H.!

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Success Is Knowing How To Spell Success

Georgina S. sent us this gem the other day:

I saw a great one on the way to work this morning. I guess this person is not suffering from a lack of self esteem, since the plate says "SUCCSS." However, now that I think about it, I suppose it could also be an advertisement for an escort service if it were read more along the lines of "sucks."

*Doing my best Borat impression* Great success!

Friday, February 6, 2009

Too Fast, Too Fidgety

Here are some plates that make me second guess your ability to drive, which is always a nice feeling. Watch your back, dear readers of this blog. There are some crazies on the roads.

Example #1DEADMN: If you aren't alive, you probably should not be driving. Check his pulse. Also, your bumper sticker, "CATS NOT KIDS," is quite disturbing. Actually, with an exception to the koala, they're all a little creepy.

Example #2
FIDGET: As defined by - to behave or move nervously or restlessly. Sounds like a great driving quality. Quick, let's swerve into oncoming traffic to avoid that roadkill.

Example #3NO YES: Yes, we all love indecisiveness, don't we? Especially on the roads. Turn left! No, right! Take exit! Decide half a second later to not take the exit! Merge back onto interstate!

Examples #4 and #5
200-MPH and LV2XLR8: Speed kills. The submitter of 200-MPH claims this is a state issued plate. She also admits that people assume this driver can get her Honda Accord up to 200 MPH. For the record, I've tried it, and it's impossible. And expensive.

Love to accelerate? *shakes head in utter disappointment.

Examples #6 and #7
ASYLUM and PSYKOTIC: Mental insanity = not an ideal driving skill! Kolleen who sent in ASYLUM writes to us:

[ASYLUM] is actually my friend's car; he has had many stupid license plates, including DRAKKAR and DRKNSS. loser!

Thanks to everyone for making this endless post possible:
NO YES: Poetry Sue
200-MPH: Kati K.
LV2XLR8: Joanne H.
ASYLUM: Kolleen

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Not To Be Confused With A Tigon

Okay. I admit it. I actually think this plate is quite clever. Mostly because it instantly made me think of Napoleon Dynamite:

Deb: What are you drawing?
Napoleon Dynamite: A liger.
Deb: What's a liger?
Napoleon Dynamite: It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... bred for its skills in magic.

I wonder if this car was built for its skills in magic?

Thanks for the tots Jen H.!

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

IDK my BFF Jill

Actually, we are all thinking the exact same thing. Why would anyone pay extra to get such a stupid license plate? OMG WHY?!

Thanks to Gina T. for her somewhat blurry, but hilarious submission. When I first saw it I was all, like,

Tuesday, February 3, 2009


Katie H. in NC sent us this article she read on the front page of her local newspaper. Notice the plates on this Lamborghini read: ITSYELLO. Here is a snipit from the article:

A piece of yellow plastic here. A turn-signal bulb there. Chuck Maner picked up remnants left behind after a tow truck hauled away a Lamborghini that crashed Friday afternoon on Norwalk Street.

"It's the closest I'll get to a Lamborghini," Maner said.

He held up two handfuls of decadent Italian debris and mentioned the song "One Piece at a Time," in which Johnny Cash describes stealing a car piece by piece from 1949 to 1973.

"If I furrow around enough, I'll get a full one," Maner said.

Good luck, Mr. Maner. Did you happen to snag that plate?

Most Wanted for the week of 2/1

Here is this week's Most Wanted list from Twitter. You never cease to amaze me. If you want in on the fun, message me @LicensePlteBlah. I look forward to your finds.

MusicGrl @LicensePlteBlah AH HO on VA sports car.

ranielle @licenseplteblah 2OZOHMY Here's hoping a tornado comes to whoosh their little green Honda Accord off the road.

ian_in_hamburg @LicensePlteBlah Hi from Germany! Do you do plates outside the US? Check this one out:

andrewmulligan @LicensePlteBlah

mouseybrat I saw these the last few days.... on a toyota "SHUSH".... on a military veteran plate "OLDNVY"...on a beat up dodge pickup "KAMALA"

I think my favorite of this bunch would have to be 2OZOHMY, because we all know there's no place like home. *clicks heels.

Monday, February 2, 2009

I'll have one Roethlisberger With Ketchup and Cheese

I couldn't decide who to cheer for during the Super Bowl yesterday. Then I realized that I could look to my vanity plate collection for guidance. So I concluded that the Steelers needed to win, because no one sent in a Cardinals plate. Then I drank a lot of beer.

Surprisingly this method worked. Thanks Jen H. for a perfectly timed submish!

Just because I spent 2 whole days archiving over 500 vanity plate submissions, I am going to bombard you with all of the losers from this year. And I mean that in the nicest way possible.
Here we have LVBRNCS. I assume your love is for the Denver Broncos. Or the Bronx? Or you love brown cats? I don't know. Any other c-words you can think of? Hm, never mind... Don't answer that last question.
Dem Bears stunk dis year, eh? Here we have a Bears Fan. I know this because of your license plate holder and decal, but to me, from afar it looks like you're into BEAR F'N. I'd like to buy an A for clarification please.
Sorry Dallas, you lose too.

Someone call a doctor!

Finally, we have what looks to be a transplanted Cheesehead driving around the state of Nevada. I am new to the state of Wisconsin myself, but I will never understand you people and your football.

Photo credits:
BEAR FN1 – LadyStyx
TCHDN – April H.
FANFVR – LadyStyx
CHZHEAD – Rogier V.