Monday, November 30, 2009

I'm not fat; I'm "fluffy"

After all of that...

BUTTAH (butter),
HAGNDAZ (Haggen-Dazs ice cream),
APPLE PI (Apple pie for nerds),
and CAKE last week...
This week I am going to eat nothing but SALADZ (and leftovers, of course).

Plate credit:
BUTTAH - MooseNuggette
HAGNDAZ - Erika S.
APPLE PI - Bonnie Z.
CAKE - Heather M.
SALADZ - Kolleen SALADZ! (You don't make friends with SALADZ!)

Sunday, November 29, 2009

You decide

Kate found this Lovin' the Lord Sunday gem, HVN R HL (Heaven or Hell?). She writes: Welll....hmmmm....lemme think about that for a minute.

Although, I guess this could mean numerous other things... For example, "heaving our hole."

It's a tough job, but someone has to heave that hole.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

The Swine Flu gets vaccinated for Chuck Norris

For everyone who has survived or currently has the Swine Flu (or H1N1 as they are calling it these days), I present to you the SQUEALR from platty. The custom (and I'm pretty sure it's custom) license plate holder reads GO HOG WILD. Oink!

What a terrible time to be a pig fan, eh. *ACHOO*

Friday, November 27, 2009

Barely Illegal

Sarah sent in 18 N UP (18 and up). I am assuming this is referring to a law that describes how it's illegal to have sexual relations between two individuals when one of the participants is below the legal age to consent to that behavior. In this case, it's 18 years old.

But I am still trying to figure out why this driver would put this on a PUBLIC vanity plate. I'm pretty sure you'll impress NO ONE with this plastered on the back of your car.

Reminds me of this related vanity plate fail: Hide your children.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

I give thanks for green bean casserole. And vanity plates.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
The only turkey plate I could find in the archives was from Michelle B, GOBBLR 3. I can only hope this car is being piloted by a real-live turkey. Gobble, gobble, gobble.

THKSx2 (thanks times two? Thanks, thanks?) is from Misha H. She thinks, however, that this driver may be giving thanks for another reason. She writes: The alimony payments must be hefty.

Our last plate today comes from MooseNuggette, GVTHNX (Give thanks). That "x" is a bit nauseating, no?

And while the vanity plate owners are giving thanks for things, we'd also like to give a big thanks to all our readers, platerazzi, tweeters, facebookers, and everyone else who makes this website the joy it is (even you, vanity plate owners)! You rock.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Forget fruits and veggies. Eat your vanity plates.

Continuing with our Thanksgiving theme of "food," I have a couple more vanity plate selections for you served hot and fresh from our archives. They are just steaming with plate rage. MmmmMmm!

Kelly T. is submitting her husband's plate, BANANAZ. All I have to say is, "That vanity plate is bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S!"
CHERRY is from MooseNuggette. Really? I wonder if this driver knows what that is slang for?
Our last plate is from Sam. She managed to stealthily catch ONION 4. Fresh, frozen, canned, caramelized, pickled, powdered, chopped, and dehydrated... How does one's obsession with a vegetable get this far?!

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Mmm this metal is crunchy

This week is Thanksgiving so I though I'd present some vanity plates over the next couple of days dealing with what we Americans will likely be doing this Thursday: Stuffing our faces with FOOD.

Here's an idea. Why don't we just stuff our minds with hideous food-themed vanity plates instead? Zero calories!

Let's start off with some appetizers...
PICKLES is from Clayton W. and as you can see it looks a bit funny. That's because it's from Australia. We're glad to see the plate rage has spread world-wide.

Our second plate is from Allison A. It reads KRISPIE, as in Krispy Kreme Doughnuts. I only hope you tried to follow this car until doughnuts started to fly out the back. Um, seriously, that would be the best day of my life.

The last plate today is CA-V-R (Caviar) and was captured by April H. This plate really confuses me. What is the appeal of labeling your car with pricey salted fish eggs? Or are you really that smug?

Gosh, I'm not so hungry anymore...

Monday, November 23, 2009

Tastes like narcissism

LadyStyx took this picture of SENSUAL. Sensual as in, arousing or exciting the senses? Of, relating to, given to, or providing gratification of the physical and especially the sexual appetites?

Because this vanity plate is equally as creepy, I am adding in DELISH captured by Erika S. Is this driver really labeling themselves as tasty? Ew!

Erika writes: I saw the driver come out a short time after this picture was taken... let's just say that no one in that car was very delish.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

My log has something to tell you...

DOXOLOG is from Jason G. I know this is supposed to read "Doxology," meaning a short hymn of praises to God in various Christian worship services. But it looks more to me like "Doxo Log."

Doxo from the Greek word for "glory" and "log" meaning, uh, log. Say hello to the Glory Log everyone!

And then flush it down quickly, okay? No one wants to look at that thing.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

More misinterpretations...

Since it's one of my favorite categories, I am going to bring you a few more misinterpretations for your viewing pleasure today.

Our first is from LadyStyx who helps us out with this misinterpretation: Ok. This could be their way of saying that they miss Arizona. It could also be their way of expressing their preferences (some families go to the beach, az 4 us, we'd rather be in the mountains). OR it could be the vehicle of butt aficionados...
Next we have LTSGOSX from Jason G. "Let's go Sox," right?

Or, "Let's go sex." Uh, no thanks.
Our last is from Crystal, 1BEBE. She writes: Did the shark eat 1 bebe?

I mean, you have to laugh because that looks exactly like what is happening on that plate.

Mmm. Tasty, tasty bebes.

Friday, November 20, 2009

Pretty sweet exhaust pipe visors, too.

I believe the only appropriate response to this would be:


It's funny, too, because we only have one other vanity plate from South Dakota on the site and it's about guns. And I thought Virginia was scary. WTF S.D.?

I know there are probably a few of you scratching your heads with your faces all tilted up to the side, so here it is: It says MUFF DIVER. I suggest you *DO NOT* google this if you are one of the confused and just move right along...

(Photo credit to Andy)

Thursday, November 19, 2009

I'm not sure how I passed my driver's exam either.

SYKO comes to us from a member of our Alaskian platerazzi, MooseNuggette. I assume this plate is referring to this drivers mental status, "psycho." According to wikipedia: Psycho is a slang word for a person who is either psychopathic or psychotic. The term is often considered mildly offensive or derogatory.

Yeah it sounds like a great idea to give a license to someone who frequently loses contact with reality.

Oh, and have I mentioned the delusions and hallucinations? They make driving such a task. Watch out for that giant purple-spotted unicorn near Main Street. It will eat you!

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Puppies, Kittens, and Vanity Plate Owners (oh my!)

How else is one to inform the masses that they are extremely attractive and adorable? A vanity plate, of course. Our first, IMAQT1 (I'm a cute one), is from Alison B. She writes: This took my breath away... on a number of levels. Ugh...

Jamie sent in QTY P2T. Cutie Patootie is defined as: Someone or something so cute that the word cute itself had to morph into something cuter.
Tina sent in these next two. She writes: "IMA-QDE" kind of goes along with the one I sent you a while back that said "TOQT4U"-- one thing we apparently don't lack here (aside from vanity plates) is self-esteem.
Yay, Virginia.

CUTE ZE is from THE GRAMMARPHILE. Her only thoughts were: The "CUTE ZE" one actually makes me a little queasy, haha.

So QT, I kind of want to ralph.

If you haven't reached your threshold of cute for today, may I suggest a little cute overload? I promise no vanity plates there.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed

Gina G. managed to capture a picture of DRUNKY for us. She writes:

Here is another one, I was going to the doctor one day this was parked right outside. I have a feeling the reason this person was going to the doctor because of the a-a-a-alcohol...

How in the world does one get away with having a plate like this? Are all of the laughs worth the nightly roadside sobriety tests? And even if this is your nickname, why on earth would you put it on a heavy piece of machinery that you operate?

I swear to beer I didn't drink God. *hiccup*

*title came from this hilarious website: TFLN

Monday, November 16, 2009

I have gooder grammar and spellings skill than you.

Sarah K. sent us CUTHEIR (See you there?).

She writes: My husband took this photo after I pointed out that some people still haven't grasped the three forms of "there, their, they're" I'm pretty sure I learned this in 3rd grade...

I guess they could also cut "heir." Ugh.

Seriously? Where did you get your education? It's EDUCATION. You're going to look really stupid if you spell it any other way (Plate is from LadyStyx).

See also: Those that can't do, teach, and those that can't teach... teach gym.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

George Michael says you got to have it.

Queendork76 captured this week's Lovin' the Lord plate, F8HN-HIM. That 8 is making my eye twitch though. F'eight'h in him? I mean, it kind of works, but trying to say that aloud just resulted in spit all over my computer screen. Thanks for that.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

I don't need to grow up and get a life. I'm a gamer. We have lots of lives.

John S. managed to snap a picture of this geeky vanity plate, 1 UP. He writes:

I had to resist the urge to head-butt this truck to see if I would get an extra life.

... As in Super Mario Brothers. From wikipedia I learned: These mushrooms have green caps with white spots (originally orange caps with green spots). When Mario picks up one of these mushrooms, he is given an extra life... In some games, these are called "Ultra Shrooms", which replenish large amounts of health.

Ultra geeky, but I kind of like it.

Friday, November 13, 2009

I'm not spoiled, people just love me.

How do I express my ability to show my excessive, self-centered, and immature behavior? Hmm, how can I show lack of consideration for other people, recurrent temper tantrums, an inability to handle the delay of gratification, demands for having one's own way, obstructiveness, and manipulation?? I know, I'll get a VANITY PLATE.

Brianne O. sent in A BRAT and wrote: The little kid in me can't help but respond to this, "I know you are but what am I?"

Check out this plate that Laura P. sent to us, DABRATT. The license plate hold reads, "Always late, but worth the wait." Try not to injure your eye sockets from the sheer force of your eye balls rolling back into them. Might be a fan of the rapper too?
This BRAT comes from Georgina S. I don't know, maybe these people are really big fans of bratwurst? Because nothing says "vanity plate" to me like slang words for German sausage, you know? Finally we have X BRAT X from LadyStyx. That "X" theme seems to be a popular trend in vanity plates these days. Idea get rejected? Just put X's around it!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

I call him my WASband

Kate sent us HZPNSHN. She writes: My first thought is.....nasty divorce!?!? Ha haaaaa!! Daaang!

That's right, it says "his pension." Which means this ex-wife bought a Chrysler minivan with her ex-husband's retirement fund and has decided to brag about it on her van.

Virginia, you make my head want to explode.

MooseNuggette sent in WASHIS (was his). This GoldWing motorcycle also has a vanity plate holder which reads: Her Diamond Wing. How romantic!

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Arm Candy

TROFYWIF (Trophy Wife) was captured by Bonnie R. A "trophy wife" is defined as:

A young, attractive woman married to an older, more powerful man. His role in the relationship is to be her sugar daddy and provide her with power and material wealth. Hers is to remind others that he is powerful or rich enough to be desirable to such a woman despite his age and thus to serve as a marker of this status -- hence the "trophy" part. A specialized type of gold digger.

Yes, something you definitely should brag about on your car. Great work on choosing a vanity plate, dimwit.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious State of Virginia

Donna F. sent us this gem, SXY T1ME (Sexy Time?). She writes: My only thought was "oh my god that does NOT say sexy time! Oh glory, yes it does!"

I am going to take a guess and assume this motorist is a fan of the movie Borat. I can almost hear this driver now: My a-wife send me to Virginia to make license plate vanity. Please, come and see my plate. If it not success, I will be execute.

Great success!

Monday, November 9, 2009

How can I drive when you're in my way?

Crazy Cat Lady Carm sent us this gem the other day. She writes: My son Eric just sent this one... I think this is the best one yet!

For those of you who need the definition, this says OMFGMOVE with translates to, "Oh My F*ing God, Move." You know what I also love about this photo? That Eric seems to be right on this guy's bumper enabling him to get this awesome photo. That way, we have a nice view of this driver's patriotic flag license plate holder. God Bless America.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Like, really, REALLY fast

Amanda M. sends us GODSPD. She writes: It looks like it's supposed to be "God speed", but I first read it as "God SPED" (Special Ed) and I thought to myself "Hey! That isn't very nice..."

From wikipedia: Godspeed, as a word, is a wish for a prosperous journey, success, and good fortune... It is also used occasionally in a non-religious manner, intended as a wish for a job to be accomplished quickly.

Yeah, um, godspeed to me so I can get myself out of this vanity plate nightmare.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

I can't think straight

Miki P. sent us LESBIAN with this note: I took this photo at Burning Man, which is why everything looks so dusty. Note the correct spelling and complete lack of numbers substituted for letters. This is a California plate too, which makes me wonder how long this lesbian has been around to score that while it was still available.


NOBOYZ is from LadyStyx. I think this is probably referring to a family with only female children, but you need to understand that this is the lesbian post, so there it is.

Who will we the catch next with our gaydar?

Friday, November 6, 2009

No soup for you!

Patricia caught this plate, ADOLPH2, in Kentucky. I mean, does this really mean what I think it does? Adolf Hitler? You have got to be kidding! And did you need to add that 2 because ADOLPH and ADOLPH1 were already taken? Are you serious? Maybe this kid is all grown up? Redonkulous, I tell you.

It's official. I H8 your PL8.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Redskins Fail

The Washington Redskins are a professional American football team based in the Washington, D.C. area. Jason G. sent us this plate, 4SKINZ which I assume, based on this driver's decorative ribbon and specialty plate that he is, "For the Redskins."

HOWEVER, Sir, your vanity plate reads "foreskins."

Epic FAIL.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

To Rule Them All

Ah yes, the only reason I plan to have children -- I might need one of their kidneys some day. 1KIDNEY was snapped by Natalie B. who writes: A bit more information than I care to know about my fellow drivers...

Reminds me of Charlie the unicorn's trip around Candy Mountain.

All kidding aside, I just want to say that I think it's awesome these people have decided to put their organs on their license plates. To those who haven't been in a situation where a fresh organ is needed to save a life I know it might come across as a bit icky, but I think I kind of like it. LadyStyx captured NWLIVR (New Liver). I wonder if they know the Liver Giver?

For more information about organ donation please visit Donate Life America at

Previous plates for a cause: We "support" your boobies.